I'm done for the day (and the semester)!!!
Today:
6:30 am - Alarm went off.
7:45 am - Call time for Wind Ensemble. We played at Commencement.
10:30 am - Cut off of exit music.
10:59 am - Clocked into Job1.
3:02 pm - Clocked out of Job1.
3:40 pm - Hung up the phone with Mom.
4:21 pm - Left for Job2.
4:37 pm - Clocked into Job2.
5:00 pm - Served dinner to Wedding Dinner + Obnoxious Guests.
7:30 pm - went to other function to help severely understaffed function.
9:11 pm - Clocked out of Job2.
It's been a really long day, but it's been good. I'm in a good spot in my life, which is nice. It's nice to have school over with. I might have to retake a class, but that's part of life, right?
I've been thinking a lot about my future and weddings and such again, now that I'm back at Job2. I really feel like now is not the time for me to get married. I'm not sure when "now" is, exactly, though. "Now" could be today. It could be this week. It could be this month, this summer, this year. *shrug* I'm totally not stressed about it. I have enough going on in my life that if I never got married, I would do just fine. I know I'll get married (no, for real,), so I don't worry about it. I'm tired of worrying about it. There are so many more interesting things in life to be concerned about right now.
Surprisingly, I'm not all that tired. I think I've been psyching myself out so much about this day that I actually have extra energy. I'll probably clean my room a bit and maybe turn on a movie.
Engaged Roommate 1 and her fiancee had some sort of "fight" last night. It threw a weird feeling into the house, and I didn't like it.
Engaged Roommate 2 walked in commencement last night, even though she doesn't technically graduate until August. I really like her and her fiancee, and I will be sad when she moves out. We're not super-tight or anything, but she has this way of balancing our house. It's great.
I got to chat with Observant Friend last night, and it was really great. He was very kind a few years ago, and spent a lot of time with me, teaching me how to hone my people-observing skills. Now I can hold my own and have things to contribute to him, and that's a lot of fun. He says that I was what he and his friends would call "investment people." He could tell that I was very passionate and wanted a lot out of life and that I would be able to pick up on the things that he had learned. One of the many things that I really like about those skills is that it's not absolutely necessary to have a lot of life experience to be able to use them. Time and experiences help, for sure, but even though I'm 17 years younger than OF, I can still help him.
I'm content with life. Really. I have the feeling that this summer has a lot in store and that it will be different than summers past. I'm not sure how or why it will be different, but I can tell that it will.
I get to go to a quinceañera tomorrow, and I am super excited. I'll get to see people that I haven't seen in six years, and I can't wait. Some of my friend's cousins have moved here from Guate. It'll be great. Dancing, WONDERFUL, fabulous, marvelous food that I have missed dearly........YUM. I've been speaking so much Spanish lately with guys at work (RMs) and one of my friends from Wind Ensemble that I'm starting to think in Spanish again. I really should get back into Spanish classes.
I have a huge list of things to do now that school's out. We'll see if I actually do them. :) One thing at a time, right?
*sigh of relief*
Yay. Now I just hope that I don't get sick. My body keeps threatening to.
4/21/2006
Lots of thoughts
CT is leaving in less than a week for the summer. I have a lot of thoughts that shouldn't be able to coexist, but manage to anyway.
For example, I've become somewhat attached to the kid, but I think the time and distance will be good. It'd be nice if I could just know where things were going to go, but I suppose it would take a lot of the fun and excitement out of life. I have no idea how I'll respond to this. I'm pretty sure that a good chunk of how I'm feeling has to do with finals. So...when school's over and I (theoretically) have lots of time on my hands, what/who will I think of? I'm not sure what I want. I don't know what to expect. All that can be done is to let life play itself out.
For example, I've become somewhat attached to the kid, but I think the time and distance will be good. It'd be nice if I could just know where things were going to go, but I suppose it would take a lot of the fun and excitement out of life. I have no idea how I'll respond to this. I'm pretty sure that a good chunk of how I'm feeling has to do with finals. So...when school's over and I (theoretically) have lots of time on my hands, what/who will I think of? I'm not sure what I want. I don't know what to expect. All that can be done is to let life play itself out.
4/04/2006
Clothes. *sigh*
We're getting a family picture taken on April 19th. Mom wants us all to be in pastels. I need to have something that contrasts with my fair skin.
I've also decided that I'm going to do skirts this summer. I don't like shorts much, but I don't want to wear pants all summer - too hot. I found the shoes I want. Now the trick is finding a few outfits. I'm not sure what looks the best with what, though.
Anyone want to come with and help me?
I've also decided that I'm going to do skirts this summer. I don't like shorts much, but I don't want to wear pants all summer - too hot. I found the shoes I want. Now the trick is finding a few outfits. I'm not sure what looks the best with what, though.
Anyone want to come with and help me?
3/31/2006
It's not so fun...
...to be woken up an hour earlier than you had planned by your roommate blaring hymns and other church culture music sung by enthusiastic, though out out-of-tune missionaries in Brazil.
In her defense, she probably thought I was already gone. Unfortunately, I'm paying a nice chunk of change to hear things (especially myself) in tune. Unfortunately, I tend to continuously cringe when she plays that CD despite the fact that I like the English versions of those songs. Thankfully!!, my ears weren't working well enough this morning to hear the notes that were 1/4 to 1/2 step out of tune. Her CD never sounded better than this morning.
In her defense, she probably thought I was already gone. Unfortunately, I'm paying a nice chunk of change to hear things (especially myself) in tune. Unfortunately, I tend to continuously cringe when she plays that CD despite the fact that I like the English versions of those songs. Thankfully!!, my ears weren't working well enough this morning to hear the notes that were 1/4 to 1/2 step out of tune. Her CD never sounded better than this morning.
Thoughts
Change has never been easy for me. Living out of state sounds like fun and an adventure, but I've only ever really lived in Utah. It could be difficult for me. I'd cope, though, and it would probably be really, really good for me.
Tomorrow, I will be meeting people that have heard about me and that I have heard about, but I have no idea what to expect. It will be an adventure.
I think I need a new hobby or two.
One of the "bigger" reasons that I've had a hard time is that it actually feels really good. I'm not sure how to handle that.
My life's not the one that's up in the air, but I sort of feel like it.
Do I really want to go to grad school?
It hasn't quite hit me that my brother will be leaving for 2 years. That is strange. I'll be graduating with my undergrad (Hallelujah!), and who knows what else will have occurred?
I like the soundtrack to Good Night and Good Luck. I really liked this film.
I'm tired and am going to sleep now. Good night. Oh, and good luck. :)
Tomorrow, I will be meeting people that have heard about me and that I have heard about, but I have no idea what to expect. It will be an adventure.
I think I need a new hobby or two.
One of the "bigger" reasons that I've had a hard time is that it actually feels really good. I'm not sure how to handle that.
My life's not the one that's up in the air, but I sort of feel like it.
Do I really want to go to grad school?
It hasn't quite hit me that my brother will be leaving for 2 years. That is strange. I'll be graduating with my undergrad (Hallelujah!), and who knows what else will have occurred?
I like the soundtrack to Good Night and Good Luck. I really liked this film.
I'm tired and am going to sleep now. Good night. Oh, and good luck. :)
3/27/2006
dotted eighth-sixteenth-half-quarter
Some might ask, "Aren't you just back to Square 1?"
The answer is definitely "No."
The answer is definitely "No."
3/24/2006
You don't know me.
I think one of my fears in life is not being "enough." I can accept myself, but can others accept me? I worry about not being outdoorsy "enough" or intelligent enough or have enough stamina to do or deal with certain kinds of things. I just figure I'll save people the annoyance of having to deal with me and my weaknesses.
A few days ago, my brain and heart managed, for a few precious moments, to understand what it would be like to be married to someone (I speak generally) and to be very, very happy with them. Unfortunately, I can't recall those moments at will. For those brief, brief moments, I felt what it might be like to be with someone who loves me for who I am, and who I can feel secure and comfortable with, despite my faults and weaknesses, and I can do the same for them. It was a really interesting, great feeling. On a similar note, the thought of spending the rest of my life alone, while there are days that it sounds absolutely glamorous, is not really what I want.
Patience and Faith. You'd think I'd get it by now, but it turns out (heh....) that the Lord still has a thing or two to teach me about those two principles.
A few days ago, my brain and heart managed, for a few precious moments, to understand what it would be like to be married to someone (I speak generally) and to be very, very happy with them. Unfortunately, I can't recall those moments at will. For those brief, brief moments, I felt what it might be like to be with someone who loves me for who I am, and who I can feel secure and comfortable with, despite my faults and weaknesses, and I can do the same for them. It was a really interesting, great feeling. On a similar note, the thought of spending the rest of my life alone, while there are days that it sounds absolutely glamorous, is not really what I want.
Patience and Faith. You'd think I'd get it by now, but it turns out (heh....) that the Lord still has a thing or two to teach me about those two principles.
3/13/2006
I could have danced all night.
Saturday I went to the U.S. DanceSport Championships. It was fantastic. Guy1, for those of you who remember reading about him, took 3rd in Amateur Smooth. He received a scholarship and everything. Impressive? Yes. Does it make me regret ending things? Not at all.
I remembered how much I miss taking ballroom classes. I took 284 twice. The second time was two years ago from this semester. It was interesting/cool/slightly depressing to note that the majority of people that I was on spring/summer team with in 2003 are now on the backup and tour teams. They're competing Gold Bar Paso Doble and Amateur Latin. It's crazy stuff. I miss wearing dance heels. I miss tango hold. *sigh* I watched the little pre-teens and was absolutely amazed.
Had I stayed at That School, things would be different. I would be majoring in Physics with an emphasis in Acoustics. To balance school, I would have dived into ballroom. Looking at the competition, do I regret my decision? Not at all. Would I have been happy had I stayed? Debatable. Might I have met and gotten to know Chapstick Thief faster? Maybe. :-)
CT came to a surprising amount of DanceSport. I typically have really low expectations when it comes to men and art. I assume that men wouldn't want to come to a DanceSport competition unless they or someone they know (like a sibling or a child) were involved. Even the ones that are involved would only stay for the required amount of time by the teacher and then escape as quickly as possible. He stayed. He also watched the pre-teens and youth. He asked questions. Lots of them. He had a hard time leaving. He came back to watch Amateur Latin and Cabaret, after he attended the Swing Dance lessons. Umm, yeah. I am *impressed.* I might have to try something outdoorsy-ish when the weather warms up, or something like that. We'll have to see.
I found out that the kid can cook. Pretty well, actually. It was kind of intimidating. I would *love* to cook more often than I do, but time and money prohibit that. It's definitely something I want to focus on and learn how to do when I'm not in school. I really like it. I also feel helpless in other peoples' kitchens and with their equipment. That may sound silly, but since I don't cook much anyway, I think it's understandable. After dinner, which was really good, we went back to my parents' house and made Strawberry Shortcake. Since my family was asleep, we whipped the cream in my basement. It was a lot of fun, and CT commented that my family has 'excellent taste in video games.' Youngest Brother was highly flattered when I told him that the next morning.
Chapstick Thief fits into my family really well. Last night, he and my dad were on separate laptops at the table, making Mr. Bennet-like comments, which made me and my mom laugh quite a bit. My sister seems to like him, and he and YB share an affinity for Spongebob.
Youngest Brother comes down stairs with SpongeBob Squarepants pajama bottoms.
CT: "Hey man, nice PJs."
YB: "Hey! Thanks! You like SpongeBob, huh?"
Mom and I are laughing.
CT: "Yeah. I really like him a lot."
Mom: "Really?"
CT: "Yeah. Heh. I have Spongebob sheets."
Mom: "That's cool, eh, YB?"
YB: "Niiiiiiiiiice." Big grin.
Major points in my family. Funny.... I like hanging out with him quite a bit.
I remembered how much I miss taking ballroom classes. I took 284 twice. The second time was two years ago from this semester. It was interesting/cool/slightly depressing to note that the majority of people that I was on spring/summer team with in 2003 are now on the backup and tour teams. They're competing Gold Bar Paso Doble and Amateur Latin. It's crazy stuff. I miss wearing dance heels. I miss tango hold. *sigh* I watched the little pre-teens and was absolutely amazed.
Had I stayed at That School, things would be different. I would be majoring in Physics with an emphasis in Acoustics. To balance school, I would have dived into ballroom. Looking at the competition, do I regret my decision? Not at all. Would I have been happy had I stayed? Debatable. Might I have met and gotten to know Chapstick Thief faster? Maybe. :-)
CT came to a surprising amount of DanceSport. I typically have really low expectations when it comes to men and art. I assume that men wouldn't want to come to a DanceSport competition unless they or someone they know (like a sibling or a child) were involved. Even the ones that are involved would only stay for the required amount of time by the teacher and then escape as quickly as possible. He stayed. He also watched the pre-teens and youth. He asked questions. Lots of them. He had a hard time leaving. He came back to watch Amateur Latin and Cabaret, after he attended the Swing Dance lessons. Umm, yeah. I am *impressed.* I might have to try something outdoorsy-ish when the weather warms up, or something like that. We'll have to see.
I found out that the kid can cook. Pretty well, actually. It was kind of intimidating. I would *love* to cook more often than I do, but time and money prohibit that. It's definitely something I want to focus on and learn how to do when I'm not in school. I really like it. I also feel helpless in other peoples' kitchens and with their equipment. That may sound silly, but since I don't cook much anyway, I think it's understandable. After dinner, which was really good, we went back to my parents' house and made Strawberry Shortcake. Since my family was asleep, we whipped the cream in my basement. It was a lot of fun, and CT commented that my family has 'excellent taste in video games.' Youngest Brother was highly flattered when I told him that the next morning.
Chapstick Thief fits into my family really well. Last night, he and my dad were on separate laptops at the table, making Mr. Bennet-like comments, which made me and my mom laugh quite a bit. My sister seems to like him, and he and YB share an affinity for Spongebob.
Youngest Brother comes down stairs with SpongeBob Squarepants pajama bottoms.
CT: "Hey man, nice PJs."
YB: "Hey! Thanks! You like SpongeBob, huh?"
Mom and I are laughing.
CT: "Yeah. I really like him a lot."
Mom: "Really?"
CT: "Yeah. Heh. I have Spongebob sheets."
Mom: "That's cool, eh, YB?"
YB: "Niiiiiiiiiice." Big grin.
Major points in my family. Funny.... I like hanging out with him quite a bit.
3/06/2006
You give your hand to me, and then you say hello.
I have a headache from lack of food. I'm currently trying to remedy the problem.
That said, my brain is swirling. I have two intense midterms on Wednesday that I'm praying I can be ready for, and I still have to practice. I also have a Mozart project due on the 22nd, just after Spring Break.
In case you didn't read the little blurb at the top of my blog, I am a music major. I love music. I think that it can do a lot of good, when used the right way, and a lot of bad, too. Our world is becoming a worse and worse place. I'm glad that there are people in the world who are willing to attempt to extract the bad. It's definitely not an easy job. For my part, however, I want to try to counteract the bad by inserting more good in the world. I don't care if that good is done on the smallest level - by being a good example to other people, specifically youth. If that good is done by being someone that makes someone else happy by being happy and optimistic, that is great with me.
Depending on your point of view, a major failing of mine is that I choose to ignore the bad stuff that goes on in the world. I know it exists and that it's out there, but if I think about it too much, it really gets to me. I can't understand why or how people can do such horrible things. I can handle the occasional 'guy flick,' but I choose to focus my time and energy on things that make me happy. Life's too short to be miserable. Yes, I'm fine living in my own world and not knowing the details of the nasty stuff that goes on.
Eleka said that I do optimism well. I'd like for that to remain true.
That said, my brain is swirling. I have two intense midterms on Wednesday that I'm praying I can be ready for, and I still have to practice. I also have a Mozart project due on the 22nd, just after Spring Break.
In case you didn't read the little blurb at the top of my blog, I am a music major. I love music. I think that it can do a lot of good, when used the right way, and a lot of bad, too. Our world is becoming a worse and worse place. I'm glad that there are people in the world who are willing to attempt to extract the bad. It's definitely not an easy job. For my part, however, I want to try to counteract the bad by inserting more good in the world. I don't care if that good is done on the smallest level - by being a good example to other people, specifically youth. If that good is done by being someone that makes someone else happy by being happy and optimistic, that is great with me.
Depending on your point of view, a major failing of mine is that I choose to ignore the bad stuff that goes on in the world. I know it exists and that it's out there, but if I think about it too much, it really gets to me. I can't understand why or how people can do such horrible things. I can handle the occasional 'guy flick,' but I choose to focus my time and energy on things that make me happy. Life's too short to be miserable. Yes, I'm fine living in my own world and not knowing the details of the nasty stuff that goes on.
Eleka said that I do optimism well. I'd like for that to remain true.
3/01/2006
Today is a good day.
My brother got his mission call!!! (No, we don't know where he's going - we're opening it tomorrow.)
Good lesson...I think.
This seems to be going well.
The weather has been GORGEOUS.
I have the Phil concert tomorrow night, my concert Friday night, and Saturday and Sunday I get to be "down south."
I have a lot of stuff to do for my classes in preparation for midterms, and the start of the end of semester, but that's okay. Life is good. I just have to remember that if I take it a bite at a time, I can eventually swallow the whale.
I'm so grateful for so many things right now. I can't possibly list them all, so I'm not even going to try.
I hope your day is going well.
Good lesson...I think.
This seems to be going well.
The weather has been GORGEOUS.
I have the Phil concert tomorrow night, my concert Friday night, and Saturday and Sunday I get to be "down south."
I have a lot of stuff to do for my classes in preparation for midterms, and the start of the end of semester, but that's okay. Life is good. I just have to remember that if I take it a bite at a time, I can eventually swallow the whale.
I'm so grateful for so many things right now. I can't possibly list them all, so I'm not even going to try.
I hope your day is going well.
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